I Gave Myself a Tattoo
I got a tattoo. It covers my entire body. I did the whole thing at once. And I did it myself.
It would be all but impossible, if not for the design I chose: Null. i.e., I’ve given myself a Null tattoo. i.e., There is not a drop of ink on my entire body.
So…you didn’t get a tattoo…
Oh no, I did…
Jiro
The first university class I ever took was calculus at 8am on a Monday morning. They … Read entire article »
Filed under: Creativity, God, Logic
Back to School: Order of Operations and the Infamous “48÷2(9+3)” Meme
On the surface, this may seem like a math problem, but it’s not; it’s a language and culture problem!
Culture
What is the proper way to greet somebody?
It’s easy to say a handshake, a smile or a “hello”, but this is based solely on our own cultural convention. In North America, a handshake is quite acceptable, but in Japan it’s a bow, in some European countries, a kiss, and in dog society, it’s butt … Read entire article »
When “Inappropriate” is Inappropriate
I find it most inappropriate when people respond to my psychotic, lewd ideas with the ultimate trump card: “It’s inappropriate.”
“Church is the best place to pickup girls because they’re virgins and sexually repressed. I’d really be doing them a favour and isn’t the intimate love between a man and a woman a type of God’s love? A gift?”
Inappropriate.
“Don’t you think the grades of teenage boys would improve if they had … Read entire article »
Filed under: Logic
ID Policy Helps Minors Buy Alcohol
The policy above, posted outside my local liquor store, is one of the best I’ve seen — not because it makes sense, but because it’s entertaining. And it helps teenagers get alcohol, which in turn helps them get laid, which in turn makes it something I approve of.
If it ain’t broke, well, it’s broke…
Any group of kids where only 1 of them has ID (or is asking somebody to buy for them) … Read entire article »
Brokeback Reasoning
For the boys, poker night is sports day. Events usually include, but are not limited to:
Best joker
Best bluffer
Best fluffer
Best belcher
Best farter
The most insightful, completely unverifiable commentary about professional sports
Chugging contest
Vomiting contest
Best “guess who I banged” story
Who has the loudest voice
Who can make the biggest raise
Who can make the biggest call with the shittiest cards
Best psychotic irrational woman story
Please note that poker is not an actual event on sports day; it’s just a … Read entire article »