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Mismatched Socks and Conscious Living

Mismatched Socks

If you find yourself looking at my feet because you have a sick foot fetish like I do, you’ve probably noticed that my socks rarely match.  I sometimes get asked if I do that on purpose.  Let’s think about that for a second…

You don’t have to do anything on purpose to have mismatched socks.  That’s the nature of the random pair generators known as the washer and dryer.  Now to have matching socks, that you have to do on purpose.  We’re so accustomed to having and seeing matching socks that it feels more like the natural order and that we have to make an effort to break away from it, when in fact the exact opposite is true.

What it comes down to is basic economics: opportunity cost and marginal utility.  Let’s say it costs me an extra 3 minutes to fold laundry if I need to find all the matching pairs.  For me, those 3 minutes are better spent doing “other things” with socks.  And to be honest, I get absolutely zero utility from having matching socks.  In fact, I get more utility from having mismatched socks.  It’s a great conversation piece and opens up the opportunity for me to philosophize about mismatched socks.

Of course everyone will put different numbers into their cost/utility equation, and perhaps for some people the aesthetic quality or comfort of matching socks is worth the extra effort.  If you’re saying, “well it’s not that hard to match your socks”, you’ve completely missed the point.  I know it’s not that hard.  It’s also not that hard to stick your finger in your anus and lick it off.  The point is, are you matching your socks consciously because you enjoy the benefits, or are you being a zombie and matching them because “that’s the way things are”?  If you go through the exercise yourself and honestly answer yourself, and you come to the conclusion that yes, I like matching my socks, then by all means continue.  I won’t judge you for not being cool.  I’m teasing!  But if you find yourself leaning on the side of “mismatch”, join me and don’t be shy.  Wear those mismatched socks with pride, and tell everyone with a foot fetish why you do it.

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