You Have the Attention Span of a Penis

Actually, a penis has a longer attention span.  A penis will listen to you repeat, “Oh God, oh God…” for at least 3 minutes.  You, on the other hand, can’t get past this sentence, let alone a whole paragraph, unless there’s a word like “PENIS” embedded to string you along.

Sitcoms must inject a punch line every 15 seconds, otherwise you lose your dopamine high and flip to the next pusher to seek your fix.  That’s right, a penis has an attention span 12 times longer than the average person.  And that’s just compared to a penis’ minimal performance.

So maybe the 3 minute penis doesn’t deserve its reputation, since we’re the ones that have a 15 second brain.  PENIS.